Have you ever been so tired, so completely spent and exhausted – mentally, physically or both – that you just wanted to curl up in a ball and cry? I’ll make a broad assumption here and say that “yes,” you have. I mean, you’re a Mom so that feeling is pretty inevitable at some point, and probably occurs a little more often than we’d like.
For me, the most recent moment of involuntary crying was on an airplane, traveling to Pennsylvania to visit with Will’s family. I was on barely four hours of sleep, and although the boys were both well-behaved, Brayden, who was sitting in the window seat next to me was just in constant need of something. By no means was it his fault or intentional – the kid is just five, and was also on less than his normal amount of sleep.
“I dropped my crayons.”
“I’m hungry.”
“I have to go potty.” (airplane bathrooms – a whole other reason to cry!)
“I want to watch a show.”
“I don’t want to watch that show.”
“Can I take my shoes off?”
“The puzzle isn’t working.”
“Sorry Mom, I didn’t mean to,” as the kindle fell on the floor for the third time (at least he had good manners)
…and on and on for the entire four and a half hour flight.
With a complete stranger sitting next to me, completely self-conscious, I just started crying. I couldn’t help it. The tears came, the quivering lip (as I tried so hard to keep the tears in), and I just felt like giving up.
I co
uldn’t do it anymore. I couldn’t handle the constant-ness. I was at my breaking point, and I had burst.
I tapped Will on the shoulder, who was sitting in front of me, next to Zack, “I need to switch, I’m going crazy.”
Ten minutes later (after another venture to the lavatory and rearranged carry-ons) I was now sitting next to Zack, and another complete stranger. I thought “finally, some peace!” but Zack was so excited to have Mommy that he got really chatty. Tears. Again. Uncontrollable.
The last thirty minutes of the flight I spent with my eyes closed and my headphones in while Zack quietly did a puzzle on the iPad. I took a couple deep breaths and thanked God for Will now sitting next to Brayden, and then I cried some more.
So what’s the point to this story? Why am I sharing all of this with you?
The lesson in this is a big giant reminder that:
1- It’s okay to cry!
2- Our bodies really do need rest to function.
3- It’s important to be aware and recognize when we need to “tag out” and ask for help.
Here’s my question to you: Have you ever pushed through, beyond the brink of exhaustion, to the point of tears? Was it because you really had to? Or because you thought you had to? Did you have anyone you could have asked for help – someone to “tag” you out? If you feel like sharing, of course, I’d love to hear about your story – but more importantly I just want you to reflect about what you could maybe do differently the next time, to perhaps stop and ask for help sooner… before the tears. I would have asked to switch seats with Will sooner, and now I know that I can.
With Love and Mommy Hugs,
Pamela Zimmer
Featured Image courtesy of flickr.com (in original form) & content image courtesy of freedigitalphotos.net