Several weeks ago the registration period opened for Kindergarten at Zackery’s school. He’ll be going into third grade (oh my gosh where has the time gone???) but Brayden will be starting Kindergarten (seriously, this “growing up too fast” thing is ferociously true!). Yep, it’s that time. I’m counting down the months, and then weeks, until it will just be days left for him and me to have our Mommy-Brayden days. Am I ready for him to be in school five days a week? Oh you bet! While at the same time, not so much.

Anyone who knows me knows I’m a planner. Sometimes to a paralyzing fault. So it’s no surprise that I have known for two years who Brayden was going to have as his Kindergarten teacher: the same teacher Zackery had. She’s awesome, she’s wonderful, she’s fun, thoughtful, kind, and all the things you would expect a great Kindergarten teacher to be. She’s also really good at what she does. Zackery barely knew how to hold the pencil correctly when he started, and by the end of the year he was reading, writing, learning all kinds of things and most importantly, loving school. I volunteered as much as I could and I became friends with his teacher. Brayden and I would even go in there to do folders (a quick job for a parent volunteer but one that was highly valued and imperative to get done first thing every Friday morning for the teacher), after Zackery had already moved on to first then second grade. We all were ready for Brayden to be in her class next year.

As registrations for Kindergarten fled in, it turns out the school had more interest in the full-day program then they had space for in the two full-day classes. Full-day Kindergarten is not mandatory where we live, but the state mandated smaller class sizes, so that means less students. The intentions are good, but when it hits home (literally) it can be a little rough to digest.

It was a Monday morning, 10:00am, I’m sitting in the school library with the Principal, the administrative secretary, the vice-president of the PTO and seven other moms all anxiously waiting to hear their child’s name called as part of the lottery to decide who got to fill those two full-day classes. It was a simple process, fair and just, but very tense. The Principal explained the reasoning behind the lottery, how it would work, and then names began to be pulled one-by-one out of a bowl, switching off between girls and boys until the classes were determined. There were sighs of relief, clapping, hugging, prayers…

In fact, earlier that morning I said a little prayer myself: “Dear God, thank you for picking Brayden’s name in the Kindergarten lottery this morning. Thank you for blessing me and Brayden, and [his teacher] as this you know is something we have wanted and dreamed of and prepared for over the past years. Thank you for delivering this blessing. For all of the moms or parents who don’t hear their child’s name called, whether they are present this morning or not, please bless them abundantly. Redeem their time and let them see how this is a blessing for them in a way that they before did not ever see. Show them your love for them and their child and heal their hearts or any sadness that may first come from this lottery. Give them peace and the means to take care of their child in whatever way they need to Father, you know what that looks like and I thank you God for taking care of them. Amen.”

Little did I know that of the parents I was praying for,
I would be one of them.

Out of the eight moms who showed up to witness the lottery that morning, my son’s name was the only one that didn’t get pulled. Brayden Zimmer was sixth on the waiting list. Not bad, you think? There’s still a chance. There was even minor talk of the possibility of adding a third full-day Kindergarten class if state legislature passes the mandate, and conversations about how often times people move last minute or drop out of full-day, so yes, there’s still a chance he could get in! I wasn’t holding my breath. Instead, I held my tears and walked as quickly as I could back out to my car.

It’s not the end of the world, I thought. I can deal with this. There are much worse things in the world than my kid not getting into full-day Kindergarten! I weighed the idea of half-day Kindergarten. It would be free – bonus! But it’s only three hours and he’s used to (we both are) going to school all day, even if right now it’s only three days a week. That idea left as quickly as it came. Honestly, I know half-day is perfect for some families, but for ours, it’s not a good solution, even if it means both boys going to the same school.

Option two: I could wait it out and keep my fingers crossed, and the prayers coming, that miraculously a spot would open up for Brayden to go to Zackery’s school. But this would mean literally waiting until August, being stressed all summer about it and wondering if he would get in. Not an ideal scenario.

Option three: the Pre-1^st (Kindergarten) program at the preschool where he goes now. Originally I had dismissed this option because I was sure that he was going to go to Zackery’s school. But after what had just happened that morning, it’s the first place I drove to before going home. I still feel a little bad because I walked in completely in tears, just shy of imploring them to please take Brayden for next year.

It’s a great program, the teacher is equally as incredible and awesome, the curriculum is challenging and individualized, I can still volunteer, they still do field trips, so why wouldn’t I want to keep him at the school he was already comfortable with and used to? Aside from really looking forward to having both my boys at the same school and looking forward to the same teacher, the major downside: cost (yes, it’s more, by a lot – think public versus private school).

The big plus side: time! If Brayden were to go to Zackery’s school, there would be no afterschool care for him. Right now Zackery goes to Brayden’s preschool twice a week after school. They pick him up right from his school and take him to Brayden’s school. And when I travel, they both do extra drop-in days. It works well. This scenario wouldn’t be feasible next year if Brayden were to go to Zackery’s school. Secondly, I don’t have to pick Brayden up right at 3:00pm every day, so on the days that I currently work a little later into the afternoon, I can continue to do so. I’ve been saying that I sometimes need more time…

God surely did redeem my time! He answered my prayer, even if it was in a very unexpected, abrupt way. He is blessing me with what I need and have been asking for.

So long story longer, Brayden will be doing Kindergarten at the school he currently is at. Five days a week, all day, for a bit more money, but it’s a win-win for both of us (even if it took me about a week to see it that way… yes, I admit, I was pretty bummed and upset at first). Zackery will be in his class at least two days a week after school, I will still get to keep my current work and travel schedule, Brayden will still be with some of his friends and he will excel in and enjoy the smaller class and learning curriculum. It’s a good thing!

Moral of the story: God always answers your prayers – but sometimes that answer is not what you had hoped, planned or expected. Trust God, He knows best.

With Love and Mommy Hugs,

Pamela Zimmer