You always have such a smile. From the day you were born. And I remember (well, at least I read that you did… yes, I thumbed through your baby book, reading what little I had actually written in there). I remember some, and it breaks my heart to think I don’t remember it all. I don’t want to get all sad though.
Today you are nine. Nine. Years. Old. Where did that time go?
I look at pictures of you and I see… your smile. Zack, you always are the one to make me feel better. You just look at me, even when you’re in trouble and I’m on the verge – of yelling or tears or both – and something clicks in you. And you look at me with those eyes of yours. Those hazel eyes, just like Grandpa.
You make it all better. You make me want to be a better Mom. Although I know I am the best Mom I could ever be for you and Brayden. You gave me the gift of this blessed title. Mom. You did that. With a little help from me and Daddy. You. You made me Mom.
Yesterday you came and sat on my lap. I love that about you.
You hug me goodbye at school. I love that too.
You are such an amazing big brother. That is the best.
You try hard, and sometimes you struggle. That’s just real life. You’ll get through. I’ll be here to help you.
You amaze me with what you know. That makes me proud. I am so very proud of you.
Your heart. You have a big heart. A heart for loving others. Keep doing that.
I know that I’m not always here, but I know you know that I love you. To the moon and back. And round and round again. I know you are proud of me too. I know you see me chasing my dreams. And I want that for you too. Don’t ever stop dreaming. Don’t ever stop doing what you love. Fill your heart with joy. Live life to have fun and adventures. Make wise choices. Be respectful. Love unconditionally. And don’t ever stop being you. Amazing, wonderful, miraculous you. You.
Happy Birthday Buddy.
I Love You!